Tax In-Senate-ty
By Thomas Lindaman on (Apr 02, 07)

Taking Democrats to task on taxes…


Senate Democrats recently unveiled their budget proposal, the first one theyíve written as the majority party in 13 years. After months of campaigning about how they were going to ďroll back the Bush tax cutsĒ and ďrestore fiscal responsibility,Ē there were high hopes for the Senate proposal. And what did they deliver? No attempts to roll back the Bush tax cuts until 2010 (which is when they would expire) and a demand that there be spending cuts to pay for the tax cuts.


Wow. Makes you glad these folks are in control of tax policy, doesnít it? Maybe next time they can propose to force Blockbuster to waive all late fees for movie and game rentals.


This year, my annual appeal for tax sanity is directed at the party who needs tax sanity the most, the Democrats. Now that they control one house of Congress outright and could control the other depending on how the votes go, itís their responsibility to come up with a plan to address the serious tax issues that face Americans. And if present conditions are any indication, theyíre going to need my help badly.


What Iím about to say may come off as condescending to some. Thatís because Iím convinced trusting the modern left to make economic and tax policy is like trusting Paris Hilton, Lindsey Lohan, and Britney Spears to build a nuclear reactor: you canít say precisely how much knowledge they have, but your best guess is that itís just not enough, and the results are bound to be explosive. I want you to be able to understand this so that I donít find myself being put in a 200% tax bracket because I mock Howard Dean.


Here are five suggestions to help you guys along as you try to figure out the mysteries of the tax code.


1) Tax cuts are your friends. For as much grief as Democrats have given the Bush tax cuts, or any tax cuts they donít like for that matter, the fact is that theyíve resulted in higher than expected income for the government. This may seem counterintuitive to liberal economistsÖha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Ö sorry, but I always laugh when I hear or see ďliberal economists.Ē Force of habit. Anyway, time and time again tax cuts increase revenue coming into the government because lower taxes mean more money goes back into the taxpayersí pockets. And with us being a consumer-driven society, that means we spend more. And when we spend more, we pay taxes on what we buy, which goes back to the government. And that, boys and girls, gives you more money to spend! (Geez, could I start any more sentences in a row with ďAndĒ?)


2) Tax cuts donít cost anything. If I hear another Democrat talk about how we have to pay for tax cuts, Iím going to go out in public without panties, shave my head, and go in and out of rehab like Britney Spears. Well, maybe not, but Iím still sick of hearing it. (Besides, I just canít give up going commando.) The truth is tax cuts donít cost anything to enact, unless you want to get super technical and say it costs us money for Congress to write and pass legislation and the President to sign it into law. And if youíre going to get that technical, then you really need more of a life. Coming from me, thatís saying something. With the benefits of tax cuts as referenced above and the lack of a real price tag for it, only complete idiots would be against them. Then again, these are Congressional Democrats weíre talking about here.


3) You canít have it both ways with the middle class. Democrats love to complain about the shrinking middle class in this country. Yet, whatís the only tax cut theyíll come out in favor of every time? A middle class tax cut. Politically, this makes sense, but logically it doesnít. Why cut the taxes of a group thatís supposed to be getting smaller? Thatís a quick way to look good politically until people figure out that itís more full of crap than Michael Moore after eating the entire holiday shipment of cheese from Swiss Colony for this Christmas. (Which, if my calculations are correct, happened around 3:00 this morning.)


4) Drop the ďpay your fair shareĒ crap because you donít really mean it. Democrats love to complain that the rich donít pay their fair share, and they know this for a fact because the people doing the most complaining about it have accountants to ensure they donít pay what they suggest all the rich should. Listen, I know youíre trying to make yourselves look like the champions of the working guy, but socking it to the rich doesnít do the trick. You really donít want people to pay their fair share because if you did youíd be supporting a flat tax or a consumption tax. What you want to do is make the rich pay tons of money to the government while doling out the money to the poor, which helps neither rich nor poor. Just level with us for a change, wouldya?


5) Get on the alternate tax bandwagon. The current tax code is more complicated than it needs to be and you guys arenít making it any better. There are simpler ways to get the necessary tax revenue to run this country. One option is the flat tax, where everyone pays the same percentage. The other is a consumption tax, which is when people pay for the services they use. This is what we currently have, at least in theory, on such items as gasoline, tobacco, and alcohol. It doesnít matter what you prefer, either system is infinitely easier than the current tax code. If you donít think so, try doing your taxes using a long form. Which long form? Any of them! If that doesnít turn you into an alternate tax acolyte, nothing will


Okay, Congressional Democrats, the ball is in your court. You ran and won on reform, so start with reforming taxes. If you accomplish this before the 2008 elections, you might stand a shot at keeping the House and maybe finally getting the Senate in your column for real and not on a technicality. And while youíre at it, could you make sure John Murtha has his rabies shots? Iím afraid heís going to bite a little kid and that will put a damper on anything you have planned for 2008.


Thomas Lindaman is a Staff Writer for the New Media Alliance, Inc. and NewsBull.com. The New Media Alliance is a non-profit (501c3) national coalition of writers, journalists and grass-roots media outlets. He is also Publisher of CommonConservative.com.


By Thomas Lindaman on Apr 02, 07
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